Tuesday, 22 October 2013

That's like My Man

This blog is written as a part of Preeti Shenoy's book - 'The One You Can Not Have' (TOUCH) Thursday no. 3 writing prompt.

The writing prompt for TOUCH thursday no. 3 is:
Anjali is a character in the book. She has dated 6 men and rejected all of them. She is still looking for Mr. Right. She feels it is hard to get what she is looking for.
If you are a woman, write 3 things (or more) that you really want from men.

Hey Anjali,

I got to know that you are in search of your Mr Right and have already rejected 6 men. Woo hoo !!! Not bad ;). So, let me tell you that we are travelling in the same boat and I too have met a few guys (Well! I can still count them on my fingers) and I don’t know where my Mr Right is hiding. But never mind as it is perfectly OK to wait for Mr Right than to be with Mr Wrong.
When I was a girl, ahem ahem ;)  Yeah, I should say ‘I was’,  then I had a huge list that consisted more of my fantasies inspired by those ‘out of the world’ romantic movies but now when I see myself as a woman my checklist  is more specific for how ‘My Man’ should be like. Here, I am sharing it with you for a thought.

A MAN - with a SPINE: Oh! This for sure does not mean the physical thing that we call a backbone :) , but you got it right, I mean the real man. My man should be the one who can take a stand for what he believes in and hence what he says and does i.e. not a player of words but a man of action. He should be able to make out what is right and what is wrong with a clear view of what he wants from life. A man with such a personality will surely be able to take a stand for “US” when required and will never hesitate to say – ‘Yes! This is my woman’.

   RESPECT – give n take: When I say respect, I mean respecting me as an ‘Individual’ who has a freedom of thoughts, actions and expressions, has her own likes and dislikes and is capable of decision making. Far above, respecting me with no preconceived notions (as there are many embedded in our society) that being a woman I am supposed to do this and I cannot do this. Here, family back ground can play a vital role like how a woman has been portrayed in his family since his childhood – one who is meant to sacrifice with nothing to ask for or a partner in every walk of life.

    TRUST – makes or destroys: I am a working woman and so I spend 10 hours of my day out in office, working with and meeting different people and sometimes going out with colleagues. I have so many friends and we catch up whenever we get time. And in such a case, I want someone who trusts me, which I believe is the base of a relationship. So, someone who keeps calling in every few minutes to keep an eye on me or someone who listens to others and not what I say is a BIG NO!

PARTNER – for life or parents: Well, I am definitely looking for a partner but is the guy looking for a daughter in law more than a partner?  Believe me, once I met a guy and the first thing he said was – ‘My only demand from you is to keep my parents happy and the rest is none of my business’ and the same moment I knew that my answer is a NO! I agree that it is the guy who walks on thin ice when it comes to make a balance between his wife and his family and there is nothing wrong in expecting that the girl will take care of the family. However, this is where he has to act smart and keep the balance. A guy entering into a relation must know that while his lady is trying to keep his parents happy, taking care of his wife is for sure his business.

P.S: I have a wish that my man would love to read books.

Apart from these, l believe, when a guy trusts and respects you, love follows. And other thing is loyalty which is like common sense to a relationship and yes it is not really common ;).

Marriage is a celebration of choice for a life time. I hope my checklist can help you in some way and I am glad to share it with you.
Happy Searching!!!

Edited for the following reason:

As mentioned, this write up is written as a part of writing prompt TOUCH Thursday no. 3, and this write up got a SPECIAL MENTION in the results:


  1. Nevertheless, my checklist contains the same elements and as it is...you always say what i have in mind. I wish u write a post soon on " I found my Mr. Right " :) Love you always...muah

    1. Thanks Pooja. I am glad I gave words to your thoughts. And yes i will surely write a blog when i ll find My Mr Right and would be the bestest one ;)

    2. If your man is pushing you away and acting distant

      Or if the guy you’re after isn’t giving you the time of day...

      Then it’s time to pull out all the stops.

      Because 99% of the time, there is only 1 thing you can say to a standoffish guy that will grab him by the heartstrings-

      And get his blood pumping at just the thought of you.

      Insert subject line here and link it to: Your ex won’t be able to resist?

      Once you say this to him, or even send this simple phrase in a text message...

      It will flip his world upside down and you will suddenly find him chasing you-

      And even begging to be with you.

      Here’s what I’m talking about:

      Insert subject line here and link it to: Is your man hiding something? He may need your help?

      Thanks again.


  2. Ok, now a man's perspective. Generally it is great if girl says about features of personality. Such as moral spine, being honest, faithful...not as those girls who want "rich tall handsome blackhaired guy with sport car, working as an executive, playing golf, educated on Harvard etc...a superman". We're not supermen and sometimes it is annoying if a girl is making a wishlist, wanting a top class man, - while she definitely isn't a top-class girl, often even is not able to have a nice talk or build a logic sentence... So it is very important what do you say about things like respect, trust and i agree with you with all my soul and heart. And I have a wish that my woman would love to read books ;)

    1. Thank you for wonderful comment. As I said it is more from a woman's perspective than a gal, so its really close to base.

  3. For me the most interesting thing is that at the first sight the list contains really basic things. There are no special requirements, no special character features. But it is just false impression... something have to happened with this world, because it is too difficult to find all of these in one man. I hope that more of us will read this letter to Anjali and will realize what are the real, true and expected requirements.

    1. Agree that is difficult to find these basic features in a guy these days but not impossible and I am hopeful that i will find My Man :)

  4. It's a great read n I must say very helpful content to realize what we shud look for. Several times we think whoever with us he is perfect for us and we just forget all these..but in true sense i realize dat ths checklist should be milestone for a life partner. We expect some more inputs from u Geevika...

    1. Thanks Geetanjali, I think everyone has a vague idea in mind like how his/her woman/man should be like but we never say it clearly to ourselves and that is something we shouldn't do. I am glad you find it useful. Also, may be your Mr. Rite won't be perfect but wud be just perfect only for you. so keep eyes, ears and your heart open :)

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  6. All the qualities you have mentioned above is indeed true. Each and every girl can actually relate to these and find out if she is dating a wrong person or right. I just love the quality you mentioned "TRUST", nowadays every second female is working and expects her partner to trust her blindly because she is working for him so they can live happy and beautiful life. I am looking forward to find my Mr. Right :)

    1. Thank u Ritika for nice review. I m glad that you can relate to my checklist in some way. Wish you the very best for the search of your Mr Rite :)

  7. Simple Lines, but very true..things become so complex....I know we all make it and hard to get...This write-up draws the perfect picture of our own ver lives...Very good one...

    A watch to add on http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0959337/

    1. Yes simple things to ask for but we people are far from simple things these days :).

  8. Nice post Geevika!

    On the last expectation you have, I believe the main issue is drawing a balance. No matter what one says about the spouse being the highest priority, the spouse needs to understand that the priority for parents does not diminish once you get married. The responsibilities towards parents will co-exist. One can not be managed at the cost of the other.

    1. Exactly! the crux is BALANCE and so i said it is the guy who walks on thin ice. None can replace the other, neither parents nor wife. The responsibility towards parents does not diminish and that goes for both a guy and a gal stepping into a relationship.
      Thank you for a nice review, it will surely help a few of my male friends who took it wrong ;)

  9. Good post Geevika. I really enjoyed reading each and every line. Wish more girls make a list like this so that they can find their Mr. Right. Good luck in finding yours. I am sure he is right around the corner waiting for you!!! :-)


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    He will make it his life long mission to cherish and please you...

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Thank you so much for stopping by. A comment to share your views about this post is highly appreciated :)